


And there is happiness

by thelastofthekurta



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:09:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29863434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelastofthekurta/pseuds/thelastofthekurta
Summary: In which Kurapika has been dealing with the aftermath of their breakup when it wasn't really over for both of them.
Relationships: Kurapika & Leorio Paladiknight, Kurapika/Leorio Paladiknight
Comments: 4
Kudos: 16





	And there is happiness

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [your heart was glass, i dropped it](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29163462) by [madeofstarlights](https://archiveofourown.org/users/madeofstarlights/pseuds/madeofstarlights). 



> It's been a while since I last wrote a fanfic. Anyway, this is based on Solar's leopika fanfic entitled "your heart was glass, I dropped it". I promised her I'll make a sequel of that very beautiful story. So here it is, I can't promise it will be beautiful too so read at your own discretion.

The night he rejected Leorio's proposal is among the hardest nights Kurapika had ever faced. He arrived at the lobby of one of Nostrade's hotels, drenched from the rain that was pouring heavily outside.

If the hotel personnel at the lobby offered him a warm towel, Kurapika didn't notice. He went straight for the elevator, paying no attention to everyone around. It is not his usual dismissive attitude that was playing then, but Leorio's voice saying the words "I love you". It played repeatedly in his head, getting tampered by the sound of raindrops hitting the pavement. It feels like listening to his favorite song over the radio and the reception was poor, only it wasn't irritating as much as it was sad.

He stayed up late that night. Laying on his bed with his phone beside him. _Will Leorio call?_ If he would, if only he would, this time he'll answer. He wondered if Leorio will cry himself to sleep. He wondered how long will it take for both of them to nurse the pain until they would be fine again. Kurapika's phone didn't ring the whole night.

The next time they met was at the Zodiacs' meeting. Kurapika did not intend to attend, yet he missed two consecutive meetings already and he felt bad for not fulfilling his end of the bargain.

Leorio was there, as punctual as he is. They were seated across one another like the first meeting they had with the group. Kurapika couldn't help but notice how Leorio was still as cheerful. As if nothing happened, as if the guy across him didn't do such an unfair thing to him. To be more precise, it's as if he wasn't there to ruin Leorio's mood. He felt ignored.

It was only when Cheadle mentioned the need for the intelligence team and science & biology team to work together for a certain mission did Leorio paid a glance at the blonde. "Mizai will be working with Geru; Saccho with Cluck; Pyon with Ginta, and Leorio with Kurapika," Cheadle discussed, not having any idea about what was going on with the two. In fact, she decided for such tandems thinking it would work out fine that way.

Leorio glanced at Kurapika who was already looking at him. He seemed to let out a smile, or was it a smirk? Kurapika wasn't sure. The blonde diverted his gaze at once.

The mission had several locations, and each team has a designated area to investigate. Leorio and Kurapika were assigned to a town near Padokea.

After the meeting, Kanzai invited the guys to drink. It had been a habit of the male members of the Zodiac every after a meeting. Yet, Kurapika had no idea about it since he rarely showed up.

"Com'on, we rarely see you around, don't tell me you're not coming with us tonight?" Kanzai said, urging Kurapika to join them.

It's not that he doesn't drink. In his line of job, drinking is among the inevitable habit one will acquire. It was the way he couldn't hold his liquor that he was afraid of. Leorio will be there. What if he got so drunk and say something he does not intend to say?

"Let's not force him, he's a busy man. He might have some other business to attend to."

It was Leorio who speak up. It was Leorio, the guy who had never given up on him, who just told everyone to give up on inviting him over. _He's a busy man._ If words are knives, those words were aimed at his deepest hurt. _How could Leorio say something so cruel?_ He, of all the people, knew why Kurapika couldn't get a life. But what could he say, Leorio was right. He's too focused on his goals to have time for anything.

The group had started heading off when Kurapika answered, "I don't have plans for tonight. I can join you this once."

Kurapika was looking aimlessly at the group, he missed the way Leorio's expression changed into something close to disbelief. He missed the sigh and the small smile that curved on the other guy's lips before he looked away.

The drinking party didn't go well. As he suspected it, Kurapika couldn't really hold his liquor. He was lonely, he had been lonely for so long. He wanted to say so many things, yet he found no courage to do so. In his futile effort to get over his feelings, he drowned himself in liquor. That was a very bad idea and he seemed to be prone to making bad choices when his emotions get the best of him.

"I get them all, the eyes of my people. I buried them in the graves of their owners. I was supposed to be happy, right?" Kurapika muttered in his drunken state. All the male Zodiacs' attentions were turned to him. "Why then, am I this sad? Why do I still feel incomplete?" Why-"

"-maybe because you never intended to be happy," Leorio butted in. Kurapika glared at him.

"Take that back, Leorio."

"No. I mean it, you are like that because you choose to wallow in your grief. You're smart, maybe the smartest person in this room, yet you can't get yourself out of your misery. That's why no one can help you because every time we send a rope to lift you from the abyss, you use them to hang yourself instead."

The attention of the group was then shifted to Leorio and back to Kurapika as he slammed his hands on the table.

"That's it, I'm leaving." Kurapika took his belongings and made his way out of the bar with wobbly legs.

"Will he be alright?" Mizaitom asked, directing his gaze to Leorio.

"Of course, not. He can't hold his liquor. There's a high chance he'll get hit by a car in that state," Leorio answered while packing his things.

"I can take him back to the hotel he was staying in if you like." Mizai offered after confirming that there was something wrong with the two.

"Nah, he wouldn't let you. He's stubborn like that. I'm just going to follow him until he got to the hotel." Leorio stood and bid goodbye to his colleagues.

"Are those two-" Saccho wanted to ask before Mizai interrupted him. "They were very close friends."

Leorio trailed behind Kurapika, not needing to use zetsu since Kurapika seemed to not really notice. He was walking wobbly, obviously intoxicated.

"How dare him to say that? I know how to be happy. I know how I can be happy. I'm just lonely here because I wasn't with the people who love me," Kurapika muttered to himself. _Maybe it's time to go with them. I'm tired of this place anyway_.

That very moment, Kurapika stepped to the highway, stood there and waited for a passing car to end his misery. When he saw the headlights of a fast-approaching vehicle, he let out a smile and closed his eyes. _Finally, I'll be happy again_.

No car got to hit him. He opened his eyes as he felt arms wrapped around him and rolled him back to the empty sidewalk.

He, and whoever dragged him back ended up lying on the ground. Kurapika slowly got up, trying his best to sit up despite the building nausea.

Leorio got up faster. He looked at Kurapika with furious eyes.

"What the hell had gotten into you, Kurapika!"

"Leorio, I-"

"You!? You tried to kill yourself! What if I didn't make it!? What if-," Leorio was shouting so loud, yet he is far from angry. He wasn't angry at all.

"What if I'd lose you?" He managed to say before tears started falling from his eyes.

Kurapika's head was still throbbing from the effects of alcohol but he heard Leorio clearly. He too started to weep. He raised his hands to cuff Leorio's face.

"Sorry. Sorry I made you worry."

For the first time in a while, their eyes met, both were clouded with tears. Leorio pulled him into a hug. Leorio hugged him so tight as if he might disappear anytime.

"Don't try something like that ever again. Don't leave my side ever again, Kurapika," Leorio said, burying his face on the blonde's shoulder.

"Even if I am a stupid, gloomy friend who never answers your calls?"

"Even if you can't return my feelings, please stay. This time I'll understand. This time I will not hold you back from your goals. Just don't leave me again, okay?"

"What are you saying, Leorio? All you ever did is understand me, even if I don't deserve that."

They remained seated on the ground for several moments, holding each other as if they might lose one another if they let go.

It had been months since then. Kurapika was pondering over those events while watching Leorio who was talking to the receptionist of a hotel they planned to check in while on their mission.

His thoughts were interrupted when he noticed Leorio was walking over to where he was seated.

"They have no vacancy for a room with two beds," Leorio informed him.

"That's what took you so long?" Kurapika raised his brow. He stood up and snatched the key from Leorio's hand. He started walking towards the elevator. Leorio hurriedly followed.

"As if we never shared a bed before," Kurapika said once they made it to the elevator. Leorio just grinned.

The feeling in his stomach once the elevator went up reminded Kurapika of the night he rejected Leorio's proposal. That time, he thought it was over for the two of them and that is for the better. That Leorio will find happiness after him, and he might find his own as well.

Kurapika was sure back then, that Leorio must let go of him and he must leave everything behind, then there'll be happiness.

He never would have thought that he'll be here, in an elevator once again. Only this time he wasn't alone. He smiled the widest he had for a long while, fiddling with the silver ring on his finger.

~End.

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't really planning to drive the story this way. The whole plot I planned to do had flown out of the window after Kurapika said he'll join the drinking party. Anyway, thanks for reaching this far. Please leave comments and suggestions if you can, I would really appreciate them. Thanks.


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